Where are you going?

 

 

"Ain't no need to watch where I'm goin', just need to know where I've been."

I usually start my blog with a scripture from the Bible. This time I decided to quote from someone real famous, Tow Mater (you know from the Cars movie. Ok my friends, I am a closet Mater fan). Do you remember when he says that and then he goes crazy and drives all over the place backwards? Ok, now that is funny, I don't care who you are, that's funny stuff right there.

Now let's look at it from the real world side. Some people get so worried about where they been and what they have been through they don't see where they are going. I am guilty as charged. I have spent years looking in the rear view mirror. There are so many sayings that come to mind:  'a tiger can't change its' stripes', 'the past is a good indication of the future', 'if it happened once it's going to happen again' and so on and so on. But are these sayings really true? Sorry Mater, I really think your a lug nut short this time.

If all of those sayings were true, why try to make new things happen in the future? Take a homeless person for example. Wouldn't you say that is rock bottom? I would. Why bother getting a job, finding a home, and getting your kids back if you're just going to end up on the streets again? I am here to tell you that does not need to happen. However, just like so many others, that is a difficult principal for me to believe.   But from my own personal experience, if you keep looking back life will never get better. It will always be like a hiccup.  Allow me to explain. A couple of days ago, my wife used this analogy with me: Do you remember the old records that would spin on a turn table? They are meant to be perfect. A tiny needle runs on the record and music plays. If the record were to get a scratch it would continue to work-kinda.  Every time it hit that spot it would hiccup and it would never get past that one place. You have that entire record to listen to and enjoy, but one spot can ruin the pleasure of an entire album. So, you would be in a never ending hiccup. Personally, my life has been in hiccup mode for a very long time.  I have been so busy looking in the rear view mirror that I have not enjoyed the view in front of me. Not a good way to run my life, but a good way to ruin my it.

Let's take it a step further. When you're driving you want to glance in the mirror to know your surroundings.  It's a point of reference, not your main frame of focus. A couple of friends told us this weekend, "There’s a reason why the rear view mirror is small and your windshield is so large." I was like my good buddy Mater, I knew how to keep focused on the rear view mirror and that is where I kept my life. Like most people, I use a navigation system. The voice of Christ is always giving me directions: go to Detroit and start an LOS there, go to the streets and start helping with human trafficking, do camp discovery, and so on. However, I never looked at the big view in front of me, I kept focusing on what was behind me. So for me I always have Christ saying, "rerouting . . .rerouting  . . . ."

Satan loves that rear view mirror. He has a way to keep you focused on the past.  Before you know it, you have become accustomed to living your life with the expectation of what happened in the past and not things await in the future.  Christ was perfect and he was always looking forward. Not just forward for His walk, but He looked forward for each of us. What if he looked back and kept thinking on the times Satan tempted him. I will tell you this, things might be a little different. Thank God that our Savior had the power to keep looking forward. Then the twist in his story. We all look in the rear view mirror and we see horrible things that we went through. Christ looked forward and He saw the terrible things that where going to happen to Him. But he kept his eyes forward and he went through those things that man did to him.  He looked forward and never looked back. Satan has plans. If he can get you to let past things pop up in your mind, you lose focus on where you are going. You cannot let Satan direct your life. As a minister to the homeless, I have seen it happen way too much.

So, I told you of my opinion on this, now let me share what happens when that rear view mirror is used properly. A few years ago, our ministry helped a couple. Gina, who we have known a very long time, introduced us to her fiance Jacque. Gina was a hard core crack addict that was finally clean. We helped this couple for months. Just like any other homeless. Well Jacque lived in the building our storage was in. One week we had a small problem with Jacque. The very next Saturday we went out to serve, we were getting ready and Jacque was looking to start a fight. We ignored him, until he walked past me and spit at the back of my head. Ok, honestly I was new to being a Christian. And when he spit on me, it was on. I came from a bad background, I am very street smart, I am Irish and I love a good fight. The one thing that I failed to remember is I was a founder of a Christian ministry and I had volunteers watching me. Well, some of them holding me back. When it was all said and done I couldn't reach him and he laughed as he drove away. Every Saturday after that I watched for Jacque to show up. I never saw him again. That was 2 years ago.

Two weeks ago, we needed to empty some things down in storage.  I took a random day and the boys and I went to storage.  We loaded up the elevator and since we could not all fit, Austin said he would take it up and send the elevator back. Then the elevator froze between floors. It took 20 minutes and a lot of "I want my Mommys" for the fire department to get Austin out of the elevator. Then it took another 20 minutes to get to use the other elevator. By that time I was so hot I needed a break so on the way to the car, I stopped and sat on the dock. It was a horrible time. Then it happened. I got a tap on the shoulder. I knew I knew the face, but couldn't figure it out. Then it hit me it was Jacque. I had a million things going through my head. However, something about him was different.  I knew it immediately. He asked if I remembered him. I said I do. And then he said this:

"Pastor, I am sorry for what I did to you. I know I tried to hurt you physically and your reputation with your group. I was on crack and I didn't know what I was doing. Your grouped helped us without judgment and I hurt you. (tears started rolling down his face). That night after I drove away, I was stopped by the police and arrested for OWI and for having drugs and a knife on me. I spent 6 months in jail. I lost everything. Then I went to treatment and there I found God. I didn't know how much I needed him. I was baptized and when I was coming out of the baptism tub my Pastor handed me this cross.

 

 He continued on. . . . I hated you for six months. I could not wait to get out of jail and find you. I blamed you for me being in jail. Then when I started studying the Bible all I could think about is the people I wronged. Your face kept popping into my mind. I am so sorry. I live in Whitehall and I woke up this morning and decided to walk here to take a chance to see you. I couldn't remember when your group meets or even if they still meet. I was so happy to come around the corner and see you. I have never wore that Cross, because I knew it wasn't for me. That Cross is yours. Please forgive me."

 I talked to Jacque for a few minutes and I saw a shine in his eyes. I knew the tears were sincere and I felt that I have a new Brother in Christ. I tried to give him the Cross back and he refused. He really wanted me to have it. We talked for a few minutes.  I offered him a ride back to Whitehall because it was such a long walk. He said he wanted to walk because this walk will be more like floating, because he was able to give the Cross to me and that he was forgiven.

I was blown away. I ask you to think on how God worked this day alone. First I went to storage on a day I never go, then my son was stuck on the elevator (the elevator was just checked by the elevator company 3 days before), then I had to wait for another elevator to get my things up to the fourth floor, and finally I was on the dock resting at the exact time Jacque came around the corner, my car was only a couple of feet and there was AC in there, but I chose to stay on the dock. I dare anyone to tell me that was not God working. Jacque was looking forward and he did not look back. I pray that his walk continues. For the ones that know the couple I am talking about, Jacque did let me know Gina was clean when she went home to our Lord. God is Good All the time!!

As I wrote that, I am reminded on how many lives God has used us to help change.  More importantly, how many have changed ours? From crawling in abandoned windows to helping a family of kids to Victor going to Church on Easter Sunday. The friends that helped us with so many events like the Invitation. The brother from Lodge that is getting the word out about donations. I think of the tears that have been shed by so many. I could fill jars, some sorrow, but a lot of tears of joy. My rear view mirror has not always been bad, but you can't live there. Time to drive forward.

As I said earlier, I have been driving in reverse. So now it is my turn to apologize. To my wife and our leadership team. I know I have things God has directed me to do and you all never question. You all have believed in me. I am sorry for the follow through not being there. Just to let you know, my navigation is working again, so it's time to move on. There are a lot of souls that are on the streets and I am working with some of the biggest hearts in Columbus. I was once told to never show weakness in being a leader. I say I am showing that I am human. I am like you, a descendant of Adam and Eve and I am a sinner. Unlike Adam and Eve, I am terrified of snakes and if one talks to me, I am warning you now- I will pass out. And I might even scream a little. Not gonna lie.

Light of Salvation is about a family serving. Not the Hogan or the Weber or even the Jones family. It's about all the brothers and sisters that have ever joined us on a Saturday. It's about the single mother that brings her son and daughter out because she knows it's what Christ directed her to do. It's the elderly friend that made a meal to serve or just prayed for the group while we went out to serve because they were not able to attend due to their health. Our family is worldwide. The windshield has been washed, our view is large and the tiny mirror is there, but sorry Mater I know where I have been, I want to see where we are going. If you look in my mirror above, the storm is behind us and it's pretty clear where we need to go!

God Bless,

Michael